DC's Harley Quinn Romances #1

This is my last Valentines read for 2024. It's last year's 80-paged Valentine's Day special from DC Comics. From the clever title which is a great pun of those Harlequin Romance novels that everyone's mom, including mine, read, I thought we were going to be in for a treat. Instead, much of this book was one big hot mess. 

Readers get not 1 but 2 Harley Quinn tales. The last story, which also stars a slew of ladies from the DC universe, including members of the Birds of Prey as well as Superman's mermaid ex Lori Lemaris, was lots of fun. It's got Harley and the gals having a Galentine's Day brunch on Wonder Woman's credit card. Each of the women describe their past dalliances with King of the Sea, Aquaman. It was a brilliant exploration of the 80 year plus superhero career of Arthur Curry. 

If only the opening Harley story was anywhere near as good. That story has Harley interrupting a Valentines Day caper planned by lady love, Poison Ivy. I don't care what anybody says, but Poison Ivy is just as bad a romantic choice for Harley Quinn as the Joker is. If not worse! The Joker is abusive and manipulative. And that's not cool. Yet, Poison Ivy seems to do the same under the guise of being Harley's best friend/lover. I don't think any casual observer of the Joker/Harley Quinn relationship could see that the Clown Prince of Crime really had no love or care for Dr. Harleen Quinzel. Yet with Poison Ivy, she might not be physically abusive with Harley, but Pamela Isley is so rude and mocking of Harley. Most folks think Ivy and Harley are soul mates. But I know the truth! That girl is POISON!

The Power Girl story in which Superman sets her up with Jimmy Olsen was pretty cool. I hadn't realized that she had been reintroduced into the same DCU universe as Supergirl. Once I did a quick Google search to clear those questions up, I enjoyed the heck out of this story. Though I still prefer Supergirl to Power Girl any day!

The Hellblazer story was also really well done. It had a lot of heart and the big reveal of the secret guest star to the tale was so satisfying! 

The other remaining 4 stories stink, Stank, STUNK! I don't care a thing about the characters of Wildstorm. I didn't like them when they were the product of Image Comics and I don't like them now. The Kite Man story was stupid. The Fire and Ice story should have been a home run. Only the writing was clunky and the ending was flat. The Batman story had good writing and a clever plot with Batman racing the clock to deactivate a bomb placed inside a random dude's neck and the new fiancee tagging along. But the artwork was awful. 

I've yet to read this year's DC Valentine's Day special. The title of 'How to Lose a Guy Gardner in 10 Days' was ingenious. I immediately placed my order for the book when I saw it. Only it's currently on back order. That means I'll be reading it next year I guess. However, if it's anywhere close to how disappointing this book was, I might be waiting for nothing but a big letdown.

What a waste of a 10 spot. A twenty if this year's offering is just as lame!

Not Worth Consuming!

Rating: 3 out of 10 stars.