All of my classmates in 4th and 5th grade were in love with the show (though I was more partial to the comics, of course) and they would even dress up as the characters and give each other nicknames based on characters. Because I was the tallest in my class, I was Moose, though I really hated that. Moose was dumb. The character I wanted to be was the ever brilliant Dilton. More on that in a minute.
To coincide with the New Archie shows release, Archie Comics released a score of new and thrilling titles that showed many of the publisher's characters in a new light. The teachers at Riverdale High got a series called Faculty Funnies. Archie's wealthy girlfriend went global on a modelling assignment in Veronica. And the gang at large were sent a thousand years into the future with Archie3000. But my favorite of the new titles was Dilton's Strange Science.
Though I hated going to the dentist, he was really a cool guy. Each patient got a new toothbrush and a comic book- of your choice! It made 45 minutes of misery worth it. One day, I got my hands on a copy of Dilton and I had the best drive home from the dentist.
As a kid, I loved science (and art!) I got really good grades, loved doing experiments, and I also loved crushing the other kids when it came to trivia. So, I always favored Dilton from the Archie Books.
In Dilton's Strange Science, the Archie gang's resident nerd gets a sleek look, an update lab, and even a girlfriend- the equally brilliant Danni. In this first issue, Dilton is showing Danni his new shrinking ray and a pair of very small aliens are looking to use it to conquer the earth. (Hey, I know this sounds goofy, but shrinking was all the rage in 1989- why else was Honey, I Shrunk the Kids a blockbuster smash!?)
By the end of this issue, filled with adventure, puzzles, history, and a science experiment or two to try at home, I was hooked and ready for issue #2. However, Archie Comics made a big blunder by only having their new titles come out only 4 times a year. So it was really hard to garner readership. (Archie Comics did have the smarts to make Veronica a bi-monthly title and sent her back to Riverdale, where she thrived for over 200 issues.) But alas, I never got my hands on another copy of Dilton's Strange Science and I don't think his girlfriend Danni was ever seen again after the series was cancelled in issue #5.
So, why review a flop?
First of all, the series was good- it was poor distribution that led to it's downfall. I decided to review this book to let parents and guardians of aspiring comic book collector's know that the bargain bins of your local comic book shop and comic book shows are overflowing with Archie Comic gems like this. They usually can be found for a dollar or less.
'But, Mr. Madman With a Book- doesn't the cheapness of these books signify poor quality?'
Not one bit. See in the 80s and early 90s, publishers were putting out thousands upon thousands of copies of a title because speculators thought that every first issue was going to be the next Fantastic Four #1. People would buy dozens of copies of every first issue, like Dilton's Strange Science, thinking that they were sitting on a gold mine. To meet demand, comic book stores would up the price significantly.
By 1993, when the comic book bubble burst and people realized that they weren't going to be able to fund their kid's college with 25 issues of Faculty Funnies #1, prices sunk to epic lows. I know of some comic book dealers that are still stuck with dozens of issues of Marvel's football themed NFL Superpro #1. (They can't give the book away.) But if you have a young one whose not old enough to be reading most of the DC and Marvel stuff on the market yet, they can still get into the fun finding lots of kids and all-ages stuff from the past 30 years for very little money.
Hey, who knows? Maybe when Ryan Reynolds stars in a live-action version of Dilton's Strange Science, I just might be able to fund my graduate program dreams...
Worth Consuming
Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.
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