Strange Weather: Four Short Novels by Joe Hill

I wish I knew how to properly explain Joe Hill's effect on me. He's such a great writer and yet, almost everything he writes either unnerves me or scares the crap out of me. No matter how much he gets into my head and keeps me awake at night, I just want to read more of his stuff. He's like a scab that you're not supposed to pick, lest it get infected. Yet, it feels so good.

The latest work of his I read is this collection of 4 short novels. From 2017, this tome came out immediately after The Fireman and was next on my list of his stuff to read, when I took a sharp detour into the NOS4A2 realm of his. That book took me a very, very, VERY long time to read considering how scary it was. But once I completed it, I then went into some of his Hill House comics before I finally got around to this anthology. 

The overall connection to this book is the weather; though it's not exactly the main subject of the story. The first two stories have the meat of the action of the book happen during a massive thunderstorm and a firestorm brought about by wild fires. The later half of the books do have to do with unusual occurrences with weather.

The first is about a teenage boy whose former babysitter is in the early stages of dementia. Only the elderly woman claims that her memories are being removed by a strangely dressed man with a Polaroid camera. The kid kinda shrugs off her claims as that of a lady sadly losing her mind to a medical monster. That is until during a routine trip to his favorite convenience store, he runs into a smarmy dude in a cowboy hat carrying a strange camera with him and driving a car full of photos starring the lad's old nanny! Don't let him take your 'Snapshot'!

'Loaded' involves a mall security guard who seemingly stops a mass shooting. At first, this man is considered the hero of the media and the local police. But when an investigative journalist starts digging into his past, the guard's account of the crime begins to unravel.

'Aloft' sees a young man about to go on his first ever skydive. Scared out of his wits, when he finally exits the plane, he experiences firm ground! That's because the cloud that he was expecting to fall through is completely solid and seems to conform to his every needs and thoughts. As he explores this atmospheric mystery, he'll also confront his past as well as the forbidden love affair that has been holding him back in life. 

Lastly, if you thought the weather of Summer, 2023 was bad, you haven't experienced 'Rain.' In this story, the Denver metro area experiences a downpour of sharp metallic nails! Walk with one woman as she tries to alert her in-laws of the death of their daughter and systematically witnesses the downfall of civilization. This story will make you question the next storm cloud you encounter!

My favorite of the 4 stories was 'Aloft'. It was so ethereal, having such a differing pace from the other stories. 'Rain' was good and if you recall that Image Comics had released a 2022 5-issue miniseries with the same name, then give yourself a cookie. That's the comic book adaptation of this final mini novel. I just wanted more out of this story and I felt that the ending was too abrupt. I'm also wondering if 'Aloft' and 'Rain' occur in the same universal as when the main character stuck on that weird cloud takes a bite out of it, he claims that the material seems like needles in his gut. 

 'Snapshot' was also very good, though I felt like the last chapter should have zigged when it instead zagged. If the closing events of the future had gone full circle with the action set in the 1980s, I think it would have been my favorite story.

The best story was 'Loaded.' Mind you, I didn't say that it was my favorite. The controversial topic of gun control and American's gun culture obsession, mixed in with dashes of race, how poorly we treat over vets, especially with their mental health, and police violence makes this book very hard for many to read. The amount of violence that occurs in this story was what did it for me. Oh, how I hated... I dreaded that ending! (Note to anyone reading this review with the power to do so, if 'Loaded' ever becomes a movie, the main character MUST be played by GOTG's Chris Pratt!)

"Loaded', in my mind, is Joe Hill's version of Stephen King's Rage, which was written under the pseudonym of Richard Bachman. I'm not trying to compare Joe Hill to his dad. I say that this 'Loaded' is like Rage because I truly feel that if Strange Weather was ever to be re-released, there is a very good chance it won't be included in the reissue. After Columbine, Stephen King took Rage, about a troubled teen who shoots up his homeroom class, out of The Bachman Books anthology. I just think if we get an episode like what happened in 'Loaded' to occur for real, it might hit too close to home for some and we'll see that book get shelved.

Every novel in this collection ended a bit too soon for me. It left me wanting so much more. Hopefully with 'Rain', Image might make a sequel. I really think 'Loaded' might one day be a movie, if not a streaming series. 'Snapshot' had potential for one of those great 'the villains isn't dead' moments (and to be fair, I never said the antagonist died). As for 'Aloft', I liked the ending. However, it had an ending a lot like Tom Hanks' Cast Away where it's left up to the reader to finish the story and I'm not so fond of those ambiguous endings.

On to the next Joe Hill work to scare my pants off...

Worth Consuming!

Rating: 8 out of 10 stars.

V #10

Issue #10 begins with one of the best covers of the entire series. Rival leaders of the Visitors Diana and Lydia stand in front of a white background, swiss-cheesed with bullet holes. Lydia is using the bar code box as a prop to rest one of her legs on. Diana is poised, ready to strike in her white commander uniform. She didn't wear that outfit for very long. But it was quite memorable. 

And those blasters! That was the coolest sci-fi laser gun of my childhood, next to Han Solo's blaster. I loved my toy version of it. When you squeezed the trigger, a little motor inside caused sparks to shoot out. It was so fun!!!

As for the material inside, there's a lot going for it and I'm not just singing Cary Bates' praises. The book feels thicker than the other issues do. Yet, the last page claims that there were 24 pages of story, which for 1985, was standard for a DC Comic. 

As mentioned with last issue, the leaders of the Resistance are in New York City on a recruitment drive. There really hasn't been much Resistance activity since the Big Apple is positioned in an area of the planet where reptiles can't survive for very long. As a result, the Visitors have focused on more sub-tropical areas to maintain a militaristic presence, such as Miami and L.A. 

However, with the coming of spring, more and more Lizards are slithering into the city that never sleeps. See the warmer it is, the less effective the Visitor poisoning agent, Red Dust, is to them. To prevent the Visitor Spring from taking place, members of the alien race who are opposed to Diana's harsh rule called the Fifth Column, are working to place a weather device atop the Empire State Building, ensuring 365 days of colder temps along the Eastern Seaboard. 

While the Resistance works to getting this gadget in place, Visitor Walter, in a human disguise, has found Mike Donovan. Under the false impression that Donovan is Diana's secret human lover, Walter is ready to turn the Resistance leader into reptile chow. Now Donovan must play the role of bait in order to keep Walter and the Visitors from stumbling upon the Resistance's climate change plans or else the coast is toast!

Like I said, a ton of stuff occurs in this issue, including a cat fight of sorts between Lydia and Diana. Of course, nothing that would affect the plots of the TV show is going to come from this battle. But it's still a guilty pleasure for sure seeing these two go at it! There's nothing sexual about the rivalry between Lydia and Diana. Those antagonistic scenes were some of the best writing of one-liners and yo mama type insults in TV history!

Worth Consuming!

Rating: 9 out of 10 stars. 

1977: A Madman Turns 40: 2017- Day 137

    Today's look at 1977 is going to be brief.

    On this date in Madman history, the US, the Soviet Union, and several other nations signed the Environmental Modification Convention. This pact prevented nations from weaponizing the weather in order to cause devastating effects towards an enemy nation.

    We had to sign a treaty preventing the use of weather WAR machines! What the what?

     Was there a Batman villain threatening the to flood Gotham City? This kind of things sounds ludicrous outside the realm of comic books! I've been do this project for 5 months now and so far, this is the craziest thing I've ever heard. 

     I'm so glad we took immediate care of this issue. It wasn't like nuclear bombs or chemical weapons were any threat to mankind! But let's make sure man doesn't have the ability to make it snow in the Sahara.

     Folks, now we know why for the past 40 years Superman just hasn't ended famines in Africa or droughts in California. He's forbidden by international law to do so!

    Geez, Louise.

    Until next time- maybe keep an umbrella handy...

1977: A Madman Turns 40: 2017- Day 26

Postcard detailing the Blizzard of 77, Buffalo NY.

 The Winter of 1977 was cold- darn cold!

  It's got to be why I love snow. 

A record is made.
Chicago Tribune, January 26, 1977.

   40 years ago yesterday, Chicago wasn't able to get above freezing and that marked a record 30-consecutive days that the thermometer's of Windy City weren't able to rise above 31 degrees F. 

     To make matters worse, 40 years ago today, an arctic wave of air began to make it's way into areas of Toronto and the Northeast. Over the next couple of days, wind gusts over 40-69 MPH were documented. On top of that was snow. Lots and lots of snow. As a result, by January 28th, Buffalo would see over 100 inches of snowfall. It was and still is a record. On top of that, snow drifts were measured of up to 40 feet! That's 4 basketball goals high!
    In this day and age, states governments will wait until the last minute to request federal help. But on this day in history, Congress actually was on top of things. Seeing how bad the weather had been and was predicted to be, Congress signed the Emergency Natural Gas Act. Signed the same day it was passed, President Carter allowed areas to declare emergencies that would normally hamper relief efforts. Thus if an area experiences a shortage of fuel, companies and the government can rush in supplies without being charged for transportation taxes and interstate fees.

It snowed so high, in places, kids could actually touch the streetlights.

    But in the case of Buffalo, this act really didn't do very much good. Plows weren't equipped to handle this much snow.  Plus the strong winds blowing off the Great Lakes made it to even when the snowing stopped, any progress made was immediately covered up again. Temps staying below freezing for about another week didn't help either and it would be a solid month before things in the region got back to business as normal.

A home in upstate New York,
almost entirely covered by snow.

    Fun Fact for your geeks out there- this crippling storm is cited as a major reason that DC Comics suffered from a huge sale slump. The publisher was unable to receive artwork on time and it was also late in publishing books to stores nationwide. Another blizzard a year later, didn't help sale any. Thus, by the summer of '78 DC cancelled over a third of it's titles in what is called the DC Implosion.

Firestorm: The Nuclear Man.
A victim of the blizzard and eventual DC Implosion.

    

This sort of thing still happens today. Late last year when a pipeline exploded in Alabama (TWICE!), companies were allowed to make extra deliveries of fuel without penalty as pumps were running out of gas faster than you could count. Just a couple of weeks ago, my state of North Carolina had below freezing temperatures and snow for several days, marking the closing of businesses, cancelling of events and school, and the need for shelters and emergency service reserves being activated. It was actually pretty early for us to get snow this year and I hope that wasn't our only dose of it! 

   Come On Blizzard!!!

     

1977: A Madman Turns 40: 2017- Day 19

 
  40 years ago today, the city of Miami, Florida saw it's first ever observed snow fall. Tampa got a blizzard of .2 inches and in Pensacola, the thermometer fell to 10F! 

     This cold spell also resulted in the only recorded account of snow to fall in the Bahamas.
   
     Now you might think this is a joke, but this kinda of thing is a big deal, especially to places that don't get snow. I have relatives who live at the beach of North Carolina and if just 1 little snow flake falls, they cancel school because they just don't have the road clearing resources we do farther away from the coast. Since snow fell on a weekday in Miami, I am sure schools were closed.
  
     Nowadays, experts say that it's the hottest the earth has ever been. I'm not going to get into some debate over global warming or climate change. But ever since I was a little kid, I've been in love with cold weather, ice, and snow. Just last week, we got a really early one and I loved it. I'm sure the people of Miami enjoyed this freak weather pattern and I'm sure I would've too. But I just have to have more than a once in 40 year episode of snow. 

     The cold of 1977 was murder on the American economy and it wasn't just due to this 5 day blast of arctic air. Winter of '77 was cold, really cold! Crops in the deep south were destroyed by frost. Over the next several months, shipping delays and loss of sales would result in higher prices and businesses to scale back or shut down. I'll talk more about this later in the month in another posting of A Madman Turns 40. Until then, enjoy these photos of the Miami Winter Wonderland.

Something you don't see everyday, snow on palm trees.

I wonder how often this lady had to use an ice scraper in Miami
before the snow of 1977...

Sharknado and Sharknado 2: The Second One

Today I gave in to the cultural phenomenon that is SHARKNADO! Friends of ours who have really good taste in comics and sci-fi recommended it and my and I decided to give it a try.

Now I love B-movies: the schlockier, the better. One of my favorite shows of all-time is Mystery Science Theatre 3000 (MST3K). It was a show in which people in front of the screen mocked horrible movies, just like I would do with friends in college (I minored in Film Studies.) The whole “how unbelievable” routine was in full force between my wife and I with myself playing the ‘believer’ to her ‘skeptic.’

Now I normally don’t combine things into one review unless they’re packaged together in a bound volume or a set. But since the two films are pretty much interchangeable, I made an exception. I will have to say that the second film was better, probably because it didn’t take itself so seriously. The opening sequence is a parody of Airplane! And that William Shatner episode of Twilight Zone. Only instead of a monster on the wing, a giant water spout of sharks attacked a commercial airliner.

SyFy and probably the world, was shocked that Sharknado was such a big hit. I’m one of those people. Even more shocking was how many people tweeted how this was the best thing that ever happened to them (The version I watch of Sharknado 2 was a repeat from Saturday with tweets from viewers last week posted in the left hand corner.) Really, a B movie about a storm system full of sharks- the best thing that ever happened to you? I feel for our country.

The sequel also garnered a lot of stars making cameos. I was surprised how many A-listers were in this thing. The first film only had Robbie Rist guest starring in it. (Yes, the same Robbie Rist who destroyed the classic show that is the Brady Bunch as the toe-headed coke battle wearing cousin Oliver. I cheered wildly when his character ‘bit’ it!) S2: The Second One had Kelly Osbourne, Kelly Ripa, and Michael Strahan, actual meteorologists from the Weather Channel and Al Roker and Matt Lauer!

I actually lost a little respect for Roker and the Weather Channel. It’s not because they agreed to do this movie. I gave them a little bit of props for that. No, I’m ashamed of the ‘reporters’ for actually reporting these sharknado weather patterns as real. I know it’s a movie but in both Sharknados, the meteorologists classify these weather spouts as EF5 tornados. That wouldn’t happen in real like as the Enhanced Fujita scale determines the amount of damage left by a tornado. It would not be classified until after the storm subsided.

I’m not going to get into the whole global warming debate but shame on SyFy and Al Roker for trying to convince me that my use of automobiles and air conditioning is going to cause man-eating sharks to rain from the sky.

Both movies are corny with bad acting, dumb lines, and even dumber special effects. However, I found it an enjoyable way to spend a mindless Sunday with a wife whose under the weather. I was entertained but unlike when I watch an Academy Award winning film, I like these movies for their lousiness not their genius.

As with any cash cow, the powers that be are going to milk this thing. I expect a Sharknado 3 to finish out a trilogy. And with other cultural phenomenon’s I would bet money that movie 3 will be in 3-D and in theatres, if only for a brief weekend showing. Will I be in line for that? Probably not, but I won’t rule out another lazy Sunday in front of the tube with some maple bacon popcorn.

Worth Consuming because it’s so bad it’s good and it has that ‘train wreck’ effect to it.

Rating: 5 out of 10 stars- this isn’t Jaws folks.