The All-New Batman: The Brave and the Bold: Small Miracles

The Cartoon Network series Baman: The Brave and the Bold was the perfect comic book series. Many hated the show for being too silly and as a superhero cartoon, it probably was a little too hokey. But it was a flawless show for comic book fans, especially those of Golden and Silver Age DC Comics. Just like the classic Silver Age Comic 'The Brave and the Bold' each episode had Batman teaming up with another hero or team for a fun caper. Actually, he'd team-up twice per episode, first during the opening teaser scene and then for the rest of the show with different character. So it was like getting two episodes in one.

The comic book followed the formula exactly and this collection of issues was a shining example of the exceptional work being done at DC to bring the animated series to as much life as the print medium can. Here, the Caped Crusader races with the Flash, practices escape artistry with Mister Miracle, and learns the true meaning of Hanukah with Ragman.

    There were three notable issues in this collection. Here's a rundown of my favorite tales in descending order:

3: A typical week in Batman's life has the Dark Knight fighting a different menace daily while teaming with a vast array of heroes throughout the DCU.

2: With Batman in a coma, the Phantom Stranger assembles a collection of Robins past and present in hopes of saving the heroes life.

1:  In the final issue, Batmite falls in love with Batgirl and along with Batman, the trio takes a historic look at the history of DC romance.

   It's very fitting that Batmite appeared in the final issue of the series as he was the last character to team up with Batman in the final episode of the series. Though I just loved that episode and this issue in question was such a treat- it's very bittersweet seeing the end of Brave and the Bold. I really enjoyed both series and think it was a travesty for it to end. (Hopefully it will one day make a revival like Teen Titans Go! has done recently.)

    Lastly, I want to speak about the books in general. I said that this volume was a collection of issues of the series. Actually, it's a collection of two series. DC published 'Batman: the Brave and the Bold' and then for some reason they cancelled it and published 'The All-New Batman: the Brave and the Bold.' 'Small Miracles' collects issues from both volumes. I have no idea why DC decided to cancel the first title and then replace it with another. But it does make for some confusion when you are trying to collect all of the issues related to this classic series.

   Worth Consuming.

   Rating: 10 out of 10 stars.

Thor: God of Thunder, Volume 4: The Last Days of Midgard (Marvel NOW!)

   The days of Asgard on earth are numbered when Roxxon declares war on Thor after he assists SHIELD in shutting down one of the corporation's illegal operations. After a small absence from the earth, Thor returns to Broxton Oklahoma only to find that the big business has bought up the entire town, evicted it's residents, and covered the city in smog and  pollution. Thor can normally deal with any sort of physical assault, but he's never dealt with an army of slimy corporate lawyers before. How will the god of Thunder survive on the battlefield known as the US Court of Appeals?

    Meanwhile, in the distant future, King Thor makes one last stand for planet earth when Galactus arrives to feed on its desolate husk. When the old god seeks assistance with a damned sword it will take combined might of his three granddaughters to save his soul. However, when a forbidden tome is unearthed in the libraries of Asgard, it appears that the present-day Thor's time of being worthy to wield Mjolnir are coming to a close.

   This exciting issues for many changes for the god of thunder as well as the entire realm of Asgard. Frigga, the Warriors Three, Jane Foster, and Ulik contribute in a story that feels a lot like a swan song for the god of Thunder. There's even a small glimpse of the female Thor that's been a controversial subject as of late. Oddly, the only major player not involved in this story is Loki for some reason and that's weird because he's been such a presence in the story of Thor since the very beginning.

  I'm sure he'll rear his ugly head sometime soon before the reign of the new Thor ends.

   Worth Consuming

   Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.

Firestorm: The Nuclear Man #4 (1978)

   There's a new hero in the Big Apple. Dressed as a Hyena ( as well as named), and just as fierce, this vigilante seems to have a vendetta against organized crime. But when he strikes out against New York's finest, it clear that the big city has a wild card on the loose. Unfortunately, any sort of conflict between the Hyena and Firestorm will have to wait until the next issue!

   This is one of those times when the book's cover doesn't match up with it's contents. I call this a 'Death of Sad Sack Cover' which is a joke from the Simpsons about being faked out by phony covers. This time, the cover bears an epic battle between the Nuclear Man and the Hyena. However, this issue ends before the two foes ever throw a punch at each other. This would normally tick me off and while it is a pet peeve of mine, at least I have the next issue on hand. (I try really hard to have a complete series collected before I read them. It makes for a long journey, but the benefits are worth it to read an entire run without interruption.)

   The art was much better than the previous issue and I thought the writing was quite good too. Though I really hated the opening splash page which depicts some bastards clubbing baby seals. It's pretty gruesome with at least one club oozing brain matter and viscera. I'm very glad that Firestorm gave these guys a bit of their own medicine.

    Speaking of the previous issue, I commented that Doctor Stein seemed very stoic after having seen most of the men at the polar research station he was visiting killed by Killer Frost. Well, I don't know if fans complained about the lack of emotion but it was revealed at the beginning of this issue that Firestorm was able to save the lives of most of the men. So, I guess it's okay that Dr. Stein wasn't so upset about that aspect.

    However, with a very short ending in issue #3 and with this issue's cover not matching its content I'm getting a fairly good idea why this series only lasted 5 issues.

   Rating: 6 out of 10 stars.

Cartoon Network Free Comic

  Free Comic Book Day didn't start until 2002. With this free comic being issued in 1997, I'm not sure why DC issued this book. Most freebies before the rise of FCBD usually were released in conjunction with an event- like the first day of the World's Fair or during the release of a new movie. Sometimes collectors could send away for a free comic if they collected enough UPC codes or you could garner a freebie by stopping by a car dealership or other business.

    With those comics, the sponsor was listed on the cover. Since you couldn't physically stop by Cartoon Network to pick one of these up and there isn't a barcode on the cover, it's a bit of a mystery as to how this book was obtained. (I found it in a grab bag a few months ago.) This comic contains three stories- all reprints from previous Cartoon Networked licensed comics published by DC Comics. So my guess is that you could get this book at your local comics shop either for free or with the purchase of another title.

   The first story starred the characters on the books cover- Cow & Chicken. It's reprinted from 'Cartoon Networks Presents #6,' an anthology showcase of other CN shows like Dexter's Laboratory, Johnny Bravo, and of course Cow & Chicken. In this adventure, Cow teaches her brother Chicken about recycling. The art looked like it was from the creator's of Ren & Stimpy. It's got some gross humor like on the classic 90s show as well. It's a good thing I'm a fan of Ren & Stimpy. But can somebody explain to me just how a cow and chicken are brother and sister?

   The next tale stars the Mystery Machine gang as they try to save Daphne from an obsessed fan. Added to the mix, this stalker originally was the suspect of one of the gang's earliest cases. So instead of blaming those meddling kids, this guy decided to create more monsters for the team to investigate so that he could get closer to the gang's fiery red head. An interesting story but it's a little creepy if you get to the bottom of it.

   The final yarn is set in the distant future. Here, Mr. Spacely tests out a robot George Jetson in hopes of replacing his human workforce. Things seem to go great when the unit is beta tested at the Jetson home. It makes poor George feel a little unwanted.  But at work, the robot goofs off more than the Jetson family patriarch saving George's place at Spacely Sprockets at least.

    Cartoon Network was a fun trip down memory lane. I didn't buy these when I was younger, but my sister, who was 12-years younger than I, did. I'd often read these to her or I'd find her old copies lying around and I'd read them if I was bored. These days, I might find an issue or two in a dollar bin and donate them to the reading program I started at my wife's work. But now that I remember the quality of these Cartoon Network comics, I'm going to make use I read them first before handing them off.

    Worth Consuming

   Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.

Earthling! (Family Comic Friday)

 

Bud's father has taken a new job in a new state. With the relocation, it means that Bud will be going to a new school. Who knew the academy was in outer space?

   This charming all-ages graphic novel begins with young Bud getting on the wrong bus. Due to a computer malfunction, a rocket-propelled bus from Cosmic Academy arrives on earth and whisks the young boy to the furthest reaches of the galaxy. As earthlings are considered dangerous and the planet earth is considered a forbidden planet to travel to, Bud, along with the help of his new friend Gort McGortgort, poses as a Tenarian exchange student until he can make his way back to his home planet.

   Tenarians are considered experts at a game called zero-ball. The game a sort of cross between quidditch and basketball in zero-g. The school's winning team will travel away from the Academy for the intergalactic championships. Thus, Bud and Gort must become the school's new zero-ball champions if they have any chance of getting the young human back home without alerting the attention of school security. Too bad Gort is considered the worst gravity ball player this side of Canis Minor.

   Earthling! is a great book that I am very glad I found. The writing/ art team of Mark Fearing and Tim Rummel had a quality similar to that of the great Doug TenNapel. The characters are vivid and they don't seem like a cookie cutter clone of one another. I could tell that Bud was from earth and Gort was from -okay, I'm not really sure where he's from actually, but each character had different tones in how they spoke and different mannerisms. Also, the kids are written like kids but they're not dumbed down.

  In terms of the art- again I must go with the cookie cutter motif. In some comics, you have trouble telling some characters alike because the artist can't help but draw the same face on each figure they draw. Not here! For example, during the zero-ball championships, Bud and Gort are pitted against some alien foes from a race of energy based lifeforms. Though each electric creature looks like a bolt of lightening with arms and legs, incredible detail is given to each separate opponent even though none of these aliens talk or are bestowed names.

   That amazing amount of detail is one of the reasons why I will read anything by Fearing and Rummel in the future, even if it's geared to an audience a lot younger than me. They made this corner of the universe a living breathing thing that made me wish this story didn't end. I hope that one day soon, Fearing and Rummel will have the Cosmic Academy bus make another stop on the third rock from the sun with more adventures of Bud and Gort aboard it.

Worth Consuming

 Rating: 10 out 10 stars.

Firestorm: The Nuclear Man #3 (1978)

  

   I had mentioned a couple of days ago that complex topics such as women's equality made it harder for me to enjoy Firestorm when I was a little kid. Well, issue #3 is a prime example of the divide between the sexes being a major problem for the Nuclear Man. Here, Dr. Stein is called to a top secret research station in the Antarctic. There the physicist is reunited with a former student of his who had a major crush on him in college.

    When her advances are rebuffed, mostly because she confused his kindness for a love interest, she gets angry, stalks off, and finds herself trapped inside a giant cooling tank. This facility causes her to turn into a literal ice princess. Now the aptly named Killer Frost goes on a rampage throughout the base seeking revenge on the male population of the facility, giving them all lethal smooches that turn the men into popsicles. With Dr. Stein's life on the line, Ronnie Raymond must drop everything he is doing- which at this moment is scoring on the basketball court and rush to fuse with the good doctor before it's too late.

   This issue is typical of 1970s comic books. If a woman is a bad guy during this time period she was either a cat burglar, a militant feminist, or horny. She could also be any combination of the three.

   A prime example of this archetype was Alicia Hardy AKA Black Cat from the Spider-Man comics. She was a cat burglar with the hots for Spidey, but she demanded to be considered his equal in every way.  In this book, Killer Frost is first seen as a bookish old maid who can't seem to find a man that either values her as a person and not a sex object nor can she discover a man who matches her superior intellect. Darwin would say that she's trying to find a suitor with superior genetic material for her to mate with and produce even smarter progeny. Or something to that effect...

   It's never quite explained why getting stuck in a giant freezer turns her into a 70s version of Elsa from Frozen instead of a dormant version of Olaf. But her reasons for turning bad against all men is blamed on past psychosis from being unloved in college. I'm usually not one to say this but the reasoning behind her villainy is a little chauvinistic.

    This outdated way of thinking along with the method of having a woman made of ice love heat instead of being melted by it makes this my least favorite issue in the series thus far. The action of a game of hide-and-seek to the death between Firestorm and Frost was visually appealing but any momentum gained is lost by an ending to seems to have Stein grieving more for his failures as a virile male instead of the fact that every other guy at the research station is now a frozen stiff, uh well- stiff.

   If you are more of a modern reader of comics, the sexism of both parties is a little hard to swallow. But remember, this was made in the late 70s during a time when progress was being made in comics to be more culturally sensitive. It's just that not every attempt hit the mark. Firestorm was great in presenting the angst of being a teenager in high school quite well but seems a lacking in the middle-aged love department.

Rating: 5 out of 10 stars.

Firestorm: The Nuclear Man #2 (1978)

   The second issue to Firestorm features a gimmick that was everywhere in 1978- the Superman team-up. With the Superman movie due out later in the year, DC and Warner Brothers were trying to get the word out any way possible. Thus, if you were a struggling or fledgling comic book at that time and you were a DC Comic- well then the Man of Steel would be visiting your corner of the DC Universe real soon. (Ths same principle worked in the 90s with fan-favorite Wolverine appearing in just about every Marvel comic imaginable and right now in the Marvel NOW! books with the box office darlings Guardians of the Galaxy guest starring in something every month.

    In this issue, along with meeting the Man of Tomorrow, Firestorm meets his first arch enemy- Multiplex. During the explosion that turned Ronnie Raymond and Dr. Martin Stein into the Nuclear Man, it split one of Stein's professional rivals into 2 villains. I never knew the definitions for fusion (how Firestorm is formed) and fission (the process that divides Multiplex in two) until now.

   Who says comics aren't educational?

    This exciting issue is more Firestorm's baby than it is Superman's and that's how it should be. But I did like how this issue was the starting point in making Firestorm an eventual member of the Justice League of America (and the Super Friends if you want to get technical about it.)  I'm very glad that I decided to finally give this short-lived series from the 70s a try. It's a really good title that just didn't get a fair shake until about 5 years later with the near decade-long publication of Fury of Firestorm.

   Worth Consuming

   Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.

Firestorm: The Nuclear Man #1 (1978)

   On Friday, home sick and propped up in my chair, I binged watched about 5 episodes of CW's The Flash. One of the main storylines was Firestorm. This character has aesthetically been one of my favorite superheroes, since the days of the Nuclear Man being a regular on the Super Friends/ Super Powers cartoon shows and his involvement in Crisis.
 
    As a comic, the book seemed a little too old for me. I liked the art, but the stories were very complicated for a 5-8 years old boy. The premise was that teenager Ronnie Raymond and physics professor Martin Stein were involved in a nuclear explosion that caused the two men to form a single superhero- Firestorm. Many of the stories revolved around the dangers of nuclear power and the struggle for equality amongst the sexes. Like I said, this was some complicated stuff for a grade-schooler to wrap his tiny little brain around. So, I stuck to enjoying Firestorm on TV instead of print.

   Well, finally getting to see Firestorm in a live action version was an awesome treat. I loved how the CW handled the dynamic of having the Nuclear Man made up of two separate people. Plus, having it explained that the reason the superhero looks like Ronnie but has the brain of Stein as a sort of survival of the fittest amalgam of the best of both men made perfect sense to me. Plus, it didn't hurt having the great Victor Garber play Dr. Stein while providing the interior monologue for Firestorm. It all worked really well.

   So let's flash forward to last night. I'm currently reading 'Showcase Presents: DC Comics Presents: Superman Team-Ups, Volume 1', in which I got to issue 17, a team-up with Superman and Firestorm versus Killer Frost. Normally, I would just read on and tried to make connections when previous storylines are mentioned. But in both the introduction and the 'next issue' blurb for DCP #16, it's urged that you first read Firestorm #5.
 
 Well, I'm riding the high from my Flash-binge and I just happened to have the complete 5-issue run of the first Firestorm series. So, naturally, I decided to give the adventures of the Nuclear Man a solid read.

   Issue #1 is the origin story. It's pretty much what I already told you about how it came about that Raymond and Stein have the ability to fuse together. The most Interesting aspect of this story was the character of Ronnie. He's a dumb jock and in a twist that you don't see anymore or ever- he's bullied by a super smart nerd! When Ronnie decides to run with an anti-nuke crowd in order to impress a pretty girl at school, he ends up a patsy as this gang is seeking to blow-up the new reactor in town to keep it from becoming a potential pollution hazard.

   I'd like to know who the brains behind this idea were. Wouldn't the destruction of a nuclear power plant even before it goes online be a bad thing? Wouldn't the uranium rods cause some sort of meltdown?

   Well, nobody said Ronnie Raymond was a rocket scientist.

    Other than that flap, it was a pretty good opening act. The cover was great and the art inside was awesome. But with a story by Gerry Conway, who co-created the character of Firestorm with Al 'Marvel Fanfare' Milgrom, I'd expected a little better thought on the logistics of destroying a nuclear power plant.

   Not bad for a find in a comic book grab bag.

  Worth Consuming

   Rating: 8 out of 10 stars.

Ultimate Marvel Team-Up, Volume 1

This collection of 5 stories was written as a potential blueprint for expanding the Ultimate universe. At the time these issues were published, the only Ultimate title starred Spider-Man. So, expect to be a little confused, if like me, you’ve read a lot of Ultimate stuff before you come to this and the plots and background stories don't seem to match what you already know about Wolverine, Iron Man, and the Hulk. When those heroes appear in these stories it is their first ever Ultimate appearances. So, like many pilot episodes (on TV), these are really rough drafts of the exciting things yet to come.

   The first story presents Wolverine as a metrosexual wuss than an unbridled animal. Sabretooth, in his bushy fur coat, wasn't any better.  I was really beginning to hate this series, when in issue 3, I realize that Hulk’s rampage in New York is what results in Banner being incarcerated at the beginning of Ultimates #1. Also, we come to a great 2-issue Iron Man tale by Mike and Laura Allred. Getting to experience anything done by the Allreds is always a nice unexpected surprise. 

   One thing about this book that ticked me off a little was that I've previously read both the Wolverine and the Iron Man team-ups before. Iron Man's story was reprinted in the Best of Spider-Man Volume 1. I can't recall where I encountered the Wolverine tale before off the top of my head, but I know I have. The Hulk story was the only one not reprinted (thus far or as much as I can tell.) Being reprinted in other formats and trades won't swear me off of getting volume 2 and 3 of this series. But since there is a chance I might have stumbled upon those issues in another format already, I will make sure I don't spend more than half of the cover price when I do come across them. 

   Worth Consuming

   Rating: 7 out of 10 stars.

   

Explorer: the Hidden Doors (Family Comic Friday)

   Explorer: the Hidden Doors is the third book in an anthology graphic novel series designed for readers of all ages. Each volume has a perticular theme. With the Hidden Doors, the idea is that each time you open a door, no matter how mediocre it may seem, you open a portal to adventure. I must say I thought the premise was unique and oh so clever.

   In this book, which features a vast array of writers, artists, and colorists, will take it's reader from the tombs of ancient Egypt to an abandoned doorway in a forest in modern day America to the future where therapists can treat trauma victims by exploring the inner recesses of the human mind. There is literally nowhere this collection of tales will not go as long as there's a doorway to be opened.

   I really enjoyed this book. Each story was about 20-pages in length. A few concepts are a little more complex than others, such as the therapy tale. So, younger readers might not enjoy that one as much as they might like the Fish N' Chips tale that stars a genius goldfish inside a robotic suit and his loopy feline pal as they try to save the world from a cat robot on the fritz. But there's really nothing objectionable in this edition that can't prevent it from being an all-ages read. No swears, nothing sexual, and very little to consider controversial- it's a near perfect graphic novel.

  As I mentioned before there are two more volumes in the Explorer anthology series. I was so impressed with this collection that I hope to be able to get my hands on the other titles real soon. All three books can be found on Amazon in both hardback and paperback formats for less than $18 a piece.

   Worth Consuming

   Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.

 

The Batgirl Cover Controversy- Pros and Cons

If this cover is so offensive then why does every article I see bashing it put it in their story?

   This week, DC Comics announced that it was cancelling one of the variant covers for the forthcoming Joker Month. Sometime in June, a variety of titles were going to feature a special variant cover that reflected that featured the title's star and their turbulent history with the Joker. The covers were in honor of the Clown Prince of Crime's 75th Anniversary in comics.

   But one title has caused the comics community to lose it's freakin' mind- the cover to Batgirl #41. The cover, which I've included in this post speaks for itself. Doesn't it? The cover shows the Joker with his arm around Batgirl, a bloody smiley face painted on her lips. The villain is holding a gun that's cocked and he's wearing a purple fedora and a Hawaiian shirt.

   The cover, crafted by artist Rafael Albuquerque, is meant to be an homage to Alan Moore and Brain Bolland's 'The Killing Joke.' In that seminal work, the Joker shoots Barbara Gordon, paralyzing her. But that's not all the Batman villain does. He also strips her naked, takes photos of her in duress and then forces her father to relive the entire event in chains.

   'The Killing Joke' changed the Batman family forever. Barbara was no longer Batgirl. Instead, the wheelchair bound redhead became Oracle- who assisted Batman by using her hi-tech array of computers to tap into CCTV feeds and do research on villains and clue leads.  Barbara overcame her trauma and was a valuable asset to the Dark Knight and even ran her own squad of heroes for a while. Then 3 years ago, DC retconned her attack by the Joker by having her still be shot but eventually regaining the use of her legs and being a superhero once again.

  Let's jump back to this week. On Monday, the story broke that DC would be cancelling the cover because the artist had received death threats over the image. Comics fans pointed out the hypocrisy of objecting to a cover that depicts violence by threatening to kill the artist who rendered the infuriating picture. DC and Alberquerque 'clarified' that they were not threatened but that fans who had objected to the image were being bullied. I'm not really sure why DC is changing their tune here but it seems to me that the backlash from fans in favor of keeping the cover lead DC to try to look less like a wimpy victim and more like a superhero standing up for the downtrodden.

So, who is to be believed and who is in the right and who is in the wrong? Let's look at some of the pros and cons of this controversy.

Pros- There aren't any.

Cons-  Where do I start?

Con #1- Batgirl is considered a title geared more towards teen girls. So choosing to release a cover in which the heroine is being victimized probably wasn't the smartest idea. DC could have easily chosen to put the cover on another Bat-title.

Con #2- the fan base of modern comics is given too much power. It used to be if you hated a comic you don't buy it. If you loved it, you yell "Shut up and take my money." If enough people buy your comic it becomes popular. If nobody buys it, it becomes fodder for the dollar box and
I yell "SCORE!" when I snag it years later on down the road. But our society is too brainwashed thanks to shows like American Idol in which your vote helps to determine the fate of the free world.  Thus, if you really hate something you just have to gripe and complain and put a hashtag in front of a snappy phrase and viola corporate America will do you bidding.
 
    The only difference between the old way of comic fandom power and the new is that thanks to information being at your finger tips the threat of withholding money is more powerful than actually not buying something.

Con #3- Thanks to a ton of complaints,  the publisher wins. See the Batgirl title isn't due in stores for 4 more months so the issues probably haven't even been printed yet. Because of the extra time comics have to win over readers thanks to information about upcoming releases are given out so far in advance, DC probably won't lose any money on not issuing a variant cover to Batgirl #41. In fact, DC won't suffer at all thanks to the haters saving them money. Without DC losing money on hedging their bets on something offensive, it won't challenge the publishers, writers, and artists to try harder. Plus, it's free advertising.

Con #4- The publishers are going to keep caving in. Marvel did it a few months ago when they decided to pull a highly sexualized Spider-Woman cover. Now DC caved in and won't release a Batgirl in peril cover. That's twice that the 'masses' got their way and it's now not going to stop them anytime soon. In fact, DC and Marvel all you've done is encouraged them to do it again when something else pisses them off.

and finally Con #5- the rift between old school collectors and newcomers to the industry has only gotten bigger. DC claims that the old timers threatened the newbies who were ashamed of the cover. So, in order to protect these fans, the cover was pulled.

   I'm in the old school camp. I've been collecting since 1980. I'm into my fourth decade of collecting comic books. When I saw the cover a few weeks ago, I knew there would be some hell over it. I just didn't expect it to be this bad.

   The average newcomer to comic books knows only from what they've seen on TV and movies. I'm not just spouting this from off the top of my head. I've seen dozens of reports on CNN, Bloomberg, Fox, CBS, ABC, and other media sites that back this statement up.

   The reader of comic books is considered a dinosaur to the survival of the superhero. It's the merchandising, movies, and video games that will rake in the money for DC and Marvel. So when somebody sees an image and it told by social media that it's evil, well the masses are going to grab their torches and pitchforks. (sorry to offend those angry villagers out there.) But when the publishers consistently take the side of the newbie instead of the established fan it's going to anger some folks and even push them away.

   Plus what's to keep the media masses from demanding that the 'Killing Joke' be permanently banned or from some poor guy who dresses as the Joker from the KJ from getting pulverized by a bunch of anti-Albuquerque cover advocates at the next ComicCon? I'm in the consensus that these sort of things are going to get worse instead of better any time soon.

   I've not given up hope on comics, but I will have to say that this most recent episode has really given me fits. It's also made me think something that I never thought I would in a million years- I want the Comics Code back. It's clear to me that the lunatics are running the asylum and social media in my opinion makes for a lousy warden. We're in the next comic book scare folks. Only this time, the industry is going to have to self-regulate in order to make everyone happy instead of protecting our youth from the evils of comics.

Sadly, the problem isn't so much that comics aren't diverse enough. It very well might be too diverse and now you can't publish anything that doesn't offend somebody some of the time. There's no way around this. But instead of trying to make a comic more diversity friendly let's just exercise some common sense here. If Batgirl really is aimed at teen girls (and believe me when I say I didn't know that it was) then don't put a sex offender on the cover doing some offendering to the hero. It's that simple.

And now, it's time for some Advil. This whole mess is giving me a migraine...

Food: A Love Story by Jim Gaffigan

   I used to be a foodie, but I'm not anymore. It's not because I don't like food anymore. My waistline is proof of that. The thing is I went from being a food connoisseur to a food artist the day I went to culinary school (and eventually graduated.) Now, I make my living as a sous chef.

   As a chef, there're tons of opportunities to go nuts. You feed people day in and day out. You attempt to create a work of art and people 'in the know' take it back because you put walnuts in a quiche or didn't make a bacon tomato grilled cheese that way their mom used to. In order to keep from going ape poop crazy either personally or on a customer you've got to find humor in things.

   That's where this book comes in. I've been a fan of Jim Gaffigan's for a while now. His bits on the various VH-1 I love the (insert decade here) series left me in stitches. Then one day a few years ago, I heard Gaffigan's epic take on the culinary oddity called the Hot Pocket and a love affair was born.

    Tim Allen is the manly man's comic. Larry the Cable Guy and Jeff Foxworthy are the redneck's comic. Well, Jim Gaffigan is the foodie and chef's comic. Though I've never gotten to see him in person, I've seen several of his specials and I must say he's pretty special.

 'Food: A Love Story' is filled with many of Gaffigan's bits about food. Along with a chapter devoted to the Hot Pocket, there's the comedian's take on cake (it needs booze), his feelings on take out, and his battle with not knowing how to say no. There's quite a lot of new stuff that I've not heard of the comic's stand-up routines so this book was like unearthing a director's cut of one of Gaffigan's Comedy Central shows.

    While Gaffigan points out the both the hypocrisy of the ultra-health nut food craze as well as the problem with our nation's obsession with fast food, I wasn't always agreeable to his ideals and ideas 100%. The comic pokes fun at pretentious food and food fads. He seems to not have a favorable outlook on them nor does Gaffigan really seem to understand food fads. But as a chef, I'm always experimenting with new trends because in order to keep up with the public's demands you've got to have your finger on the pulse of what's hot and new in food.

     For example, I hate kale as much as Gaffigan does. But right now it's the in super food. So, that means I got to cook with it. It just doesn't mean I have to use it every day or go insane and make a kale gazpacho with a kale brownie crumble either. Besides, it's those food fads that will sometimes lure your customers into your establishment. And let's not forget that hot dogs, waffle cones, and hot sauce were once considered food fads. Now they're everyday items around the house.

   The great thing about Jim Gaffigan is that he's clean. Not everything he talks about is for all age groups. But I just read 340 pages of his stuff and I don't remember very many swears and the f-word was nowhere to be found. Unless you count the word 'fat.'

    This book is Gaffigan's second work. Speaking of fat, the name of his first book is called 'Dad is Fat.' After really enjoying this funny tome, I want to find it. I just hope it's as much as a treat as this edition was.

     Lastly, I want to throw something out there just in case this review ever stumbles across Jim Gaffigan's way. I really think 'Food: A Love Story' would make a great series on History Channel or Travel Channel. I see it as a cross between a history of food show mixed in with some cooking segments and a peppering of Gaffigan's humor in between. It would be like Seinfeld meets Man Vs. Food. If Jim ever does make a series based on my idea all I ask for is the following: an autographed book, two tickets to a show, and to be in one episode of the series.

  Worth Consuming

   Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.

CASPER THE FRIENDLY GHOST'S DENTAL HEALTH ACTIVITY BOOK

   I hated going to the dentist when I was a kid. Not much has changed as an adult, but I really hated it as a kid. I had a ton of cavities and when I had to have a filling, I always had this thing wedged into the jaw of my mouth, called a raincoat. Having it inserted hurt like hell and I still think to this day it's been a leading contributor to my TMJ.

    But one of the things I really enjoyed about the dentist was getting the free prize at the end of the visit. You always got 3 things: a new toothbrush, a sticker, and a comic book of your choice! For an avid collector like myself, it was the ultimate score and probably the only reason I didn't hide or run away when it was time to visit the dentist. Amongst the comic heroes I could choose from were Donald Duck, Casper, Richie Rich, and the Archie Gang. After picking one of those beauties, it was fun times in the car ride home.

    Sadly, those days are over. All I ever get from visiting my dentist now is that little goodie bag with a toothbrush, some floss, and a tube of toothpaste. True, I am extremely vigilant with my dental hygiene these days. I pride myself in staying away from those darn cavities. But I would gladly give up the free toothpaste to get a comic book for all my dental troubles.

  A few months ago, I found this activity comic at a thrift store. Sure, it has zero value, some of the pages have been colored and filled in, and the cover has a grease penciled price of 10 cents on it. But this is one of the comic books I remember getting as a kid.

  I particularly remember this book for a couple of reasons. Every year a couple of dentist assistants would come to my school and do a little presentation on how to floss and brush your teeth. ( I still remember the song "wiggle giggle, wiggle giggle...1-2-3" as a way to remember how to clean each tooth.) This book was one of the items they would pass out after the lecture. Casper's Activity Book was also an incentive at my dentist that if you choose it, you could pick 2 bonus comics instead of just one. 3 books for a visit that normally would net me just one book? Yes, please. Needless to say, I racked up a bunch of these activity books.

   Drawn in stark black and white, it stars Casper the Friendly Ghost, his ghoulish brothers, and some other guests. Filled with your standard activities: connect the dots, word scramble, mazes, pages to color, and matching, one activity that was always included and I just despised, were the jumbled pictures. With that you either had to copy by hand or cut out and glue. Mine never came out right and cut up a comic book? Are you crazy?

    This little booklet was a fun little trip down memory lane. Too bad you don't see many dentists giving away free comics anymore and if they do, well I just happened to pick one who didn't. It's too bad that those type of freebies don't occur to adults. Like I said earlier, I'd gladly choose an activity book like this in order to get two more instead of that stupid toothpaste goodie bag.

  Worth Consuming

  Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.

 

Guardians of the Galaxy, Volume 2: Angela (Marvel NOW!)

  I've got to get my hands on the crossover event 'Infinity.' With completing volume 2 of Guardians, that will make it 4 'Infinity' tie-ins that I have read. If there's one thing I can tell you about that storyline is that I know Thanos is involved and he has his sights set on earth. Other than that, I am at a loss as to what that series really is about.

   Marvel's done a fantastic job getting just about every one of their series to tie-in together. The bullpen of the 2010s have built upon Lee and Kirby's philosophy established during the Marvel Age of Comics in the 1960s and exceeded that vision to the Nth degree. Events in this volume relate to important storylines in the various Marvel NOW! Avengers titles as well as Iron Man. I give major kudos to the editors at the House of Ideas for keeping all of these threads straight. I know I've would've made a few knots if that was all up to me.

  In this volume, the bounds of reality have continued to crack throughout the Marvel Universe. Star-Lord is plagued by a terrible vision of all his possible realities and now he seeks out his biggest enemy for answers. Meanwhile, the rest of the Guardians attempt to exercise some R & R  but when an Asgardian princess from an alternate universe that shouldn't exist attempts to kill Gamora, the most dangerous woman in the universe, it's back to business as usual. For the Guardians, that means rescuing SWORD from the clutches of Thanos' armies and eventually saving the earth from the Mad Titan himself.

    'Angela' sees the end of Iron Man's tenure with the team. But I suspect that with the appearance of the assassin of Asgard, the Guardians are going to have a new teammate albeit probably only for a short while. Having two deadly women on one team will make for some killer moments but eventually there's only going to be room for one alpha female.

   The art is dynamic and it matches the might of this action-packed volume. The array of variant covers is stunning as well. But I must say that as an EC Comics fan, I just adore the Weird Science variant covers the most.

   Now to get my hands on that Infinity book I mentioned earlier...

  Worth Consuming

   Rating: 9 out of 10 stars.